1.5.15

Friendships have been on my mind a lot lately. It is so strange to me that even after 22 years of living I still have a hard time realizing that friendships come and go. I mean, this is something I have dealt with my whole life, and something I always was able to remember when things just weren't right anymore. I think this time it is different, because I see friendships fading that I never thought would. I feel hurt, but I know it isn't their fault. Friendships come and go, and you can't always be in charge of the going.

Ever since Zac and I got engaged I have seen a shift in my friendships. There are those friendships that have become closer and more intimate, and then there are friendships that have slowly started to disintegrate. For a while I was so angry about this. I didn't understand what had changed, and why things had changed so quickly. I started noticing that all effort of rekindling these somehow broken relationships was on my shoulders, and I was caring all the weight.

I guess the new year came with a new perspective in realizing that even though I thought nothing had changed, things indeed had. I am getting married this year. I am moving on in my life. I am opening a new chapter, and things are going to be different. Being married is different than being someones boyfriend or girlfriend. It is a solid relationship. Although Zac and I had always talked about getting married with our friends it is a whole different scenario now that it is a reality.

So I guess I would just like to say thank you to those friends that have stuck by. I am so excited to share the next year with you! I know this is going to be a year to remember. I feel like I have always valued my friendships, but going through this experience has shed a new light on how truly important my friendships are to me. This year I am going to strive to be a better friend, and to make more time for them in my life.

For those friendships that have faded, all I can say is every single person in my life has impacted me in such incredible ways. I have been so blessed to know such amazing humans, and I understand that sometimes lifestyles change, and with that friendships change as well. I am so grateful for the friends that were such a big part of my life in 2014, and I hope that I will always remember that.

So here is to a new year. A year of continuing friendships growing stronger, and hopefully some new ones along the way.

4.17.14

You know what I have realized? Having a blog is hard sometimes. I feel like I never really know what I want this blog to be, so I guess it just has to be a little bit of everything. Sometimes it is hard to be 100% you when you are in a world where everything is evolving into something new and better. Sometimes you just want to give in, just so it's easier. At least you think it will be easier. I have found it is actually a whole lot harder. It is hard to try and be someone you are not. So this blog of mine is just a little bit of everything. Sure, it is never going to be some huge and crazy thing, but I guess it just really doesn't matter. That stuff just isn't important to me anymore. It's just to hard trying to keep up with things you don't believe in. So that is why I am going to tell you about my day. 

Today was an incredibly good day! I did have to get up early for class which is basically hell in a nutshell, but I somehow made it onto the bus at 8:20am. How I have managed to do that every day this semester is beyond me! Oh wait... that hasn't happened. Like for real you guys, I am happy if I make it to school twice a week. Spring semester just end already! 

After I basically ran out of class to avoid the campus wide earthquake drill, I ended up catching an earlier bus than usual, so that was nice to get home early. I basically just sat around and relaxed until noon instead of studying for finals, because you know, priorities. Than I hopped in the car and headed over to Emma's lovely home. 

I'm sure most of you know the lovely Emma from Tightrope to the Sun. If you don't, you best be making your way over to that pretty little blog of hers right this second. Like seriously, her writing will make you feel ALL THE FEELINGS! No joke. 

Basically, Emma is one of my favorite humans in the universe, so we decided to have lunch today. We walked down to the coolest little cafe on her street, BECAUSE IT WAS ALL SORTS OF GORGEOUS OUTSIDE, and ate delicious food. Like seriously, I will rave on about this bagel that I had! Cream cheese, avocado, and tomatoes. It was unreal you guys. Not even a joke. 

Of course every time I get together with Emma it has been about a billion years since we have last seen each other, so we always have so many stories to catch up on. Emma is seriously the greatest human to talk to. We can have the most serious conversations, but then somehow we both end up cracking up at whatever is going on. Her life is pretty hilarious. Sometimes I just can't even handle it. She is one stellar human being. But seriously, Emma is one of my best friends, and I literally tell her everything. We both tend to be a tiny bit anti-social, so that is why we don't see each other that often. That and we are both crazy busy, but we are working on it!! But seriously, everyone needs a friend like Emma. Someone who you know you can tell ANYTHING to, and there will not be a single bit of judgement. She has been a major support in a big transition in my life, and I will never be able to thank her enough for that. She really is the absolute greatest. 

Alright, that is basically the end of my good day, because you obviously can't beat hanging out with Emma! Especially when Zachary is in Moab for a week. She is always a highlight to my week, so yeah... GO READ HER BLOG OR SOMETHING!

P.s- I finally got to see her Gatsby tattoo in person, and I all sorts of died inside.

*image via pinterest